In a feeble attempt to encourage reader participation, I do hereby declare the first The Bedford Hillsian Caption Contest (TBHCC) underway. Warm up your brains and sharpen your tongues because here's the first photo:
We got Pinkerton on the right, Lincoln in the middle, and McClernard on the right. For a more detailed version of the photo go here. Leave your entries in the comments. Oh, and some rules. Leave as many entries as you want. For the caption, you can make any or all of the characters speak or just describe the scene (I put the speech bubble over everyone as an example don't let it constain your fertile mind). Good luck, all.
Pinkerton: You want a piece of Lincoln? To bad, cuz you gettin a piece a PINKERTON!
Lincoln: The ladies love the top hat and Lincoln loves their bottoms fat.
McClernard: YES, SIR!
(Photo by Alexander Gardner via Library of Congress)
Pinkerton: "Hey were you guys there when I farted?"
Ah, Mr. President, was that arachnophobia or arachnadactyly?
You two are sure you didn't see the miscreants who stole my ether and replaced it with a ribald note? 'Cause I wasn't in the crapper that long, and you were the only ones in the tent when I left.
McLernard: My word it's hot!
Pinkerton: Try trimming the beard, asshole. It's July.
McLernard: Good one. Your words are almost as funny as your fat face.
McLernard: That's what your beloved mother said when I took her for a lovely carriage ride the other fortnight.
Lincoln: I keep ice cubes in my hat. It's smart. That's why I'm president and you two beards are just my simple goons.
Pinkerton: How gloriously piquant.
McLernard: Abe, You're such a card.
Pinkerton: Hey Pinky, go get us some Pepsis, will ya?
McLernard: I got your Pepsis right here.
Lincoln: Seriously, though. A glass of anything would be nice. Sitting in that tent all afternoon gave me a presidential case of the swamp ass.
Lincoln: We have fun.
Pinkerton: "Hey did you hear something"
McClernard: "Hey Lincoln did I hear something?"
Lincoln: "I don't know!"
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