President Hobo

So, I'm following JFK and Jackie O down the sidewalks of Dallas while they're on their way to some strange skyscraper/church to the wedding of one of the more obscure Kennedy brothers. The place is fairly deserted and the clouds cast a weird sepia tone over everything. Suddenly, a loud bang crackles through the air and Jackie O enthusiastically leaps on top of JFK to shield him with her body.

She's so into it that he's forced to cower against the wall while the secret service are scrambling around like ants on a freshly kicked anthill. JFK finally gets up and rushes into the church with the secret service close behind. No one is hurt. Then, even though the entire presidential party is safely in the church, some more shots ring out. I trace the sound back to it's source and discover a bunch of construction worker running around a building site firing rifles at the girders. Possibly because of their love of the second amendment, rifles play some role in the construction industry in Dallas.

But, the secret service still has no idea where the shots came from. So, they come up with the brilliant idea of disguising Kennedy as a hobo to protect him. To complete the illusion, they send JFK stumbling ahead alone while they follow about a block behind.


The plan works as far as it get the hobo president across town and into an old two story house badly in need of repairs. JFK stumbles through the front door to find the CIA agents all sitting around playing poker, smoking cigarettes in dirty wife beaters and wholly unprepared to see the president dressed in rags. But, being professionals, it doesn't take long for them to spring into action.

While everyone's setting up chairs and wiping down tables and moving large pieces of radio equipment around make things a bit more presidential, I take the opportunity to talk to the coordinator of the safe house. For no reason that I can discern, I ask him why he joined the CIA. He gets a distant look in his eye, then starts shaking his fists at the heavens and yelling "Damn you, Castro!". He picks up a sledgehammer that's lying around and starts smashing everything in front of him (including the flimsy walls). The whole house collapses.

I thought that dream was weird when I had it but now I find out that there's an actual conspiracy theory that JFK was killed as part of a hobo plot. I guess people who've seen the Oliver Stone movie already know about this. And now, looking at that combination of Rockwell and a JFK portrait is giving me some wicked deja vu.